Family is Family.

 

Family is Family. You come to appreciate them as  you get older and love them even more the further you move from them. Moving to Austria, I put the most distance between siblings since Jana lived in Alaska or Arizona. Now we're all doing different things. Not that we haven't always done different things - that's what happens when you're as spread out as we are. I like it, though. We're all in different stages. All doing different stepping stones. Jana's getting her family growing, Kyle's getting his working career off the ground, Rachelle is just coming into her own in high school and I'm off figuring out what I want to do for the rest of my life. Cousins are all over the place and life is crazy, but we all love each other just the same. I've never appreciated family more than I did sitting at a big table at Christmas, throwing buns across the room to whoever needed them, hearing everyone eating and drinking wine, laughing and yelling. You come to love that - miss it. It's hard being so far from home, but I know it's made me a better person. It's given me a lot of new stories and experiences to shape who I am and has forced me to leave my comfort zone in a way I never knew I could. Family is family, though. I'll be looking forward to coming home in May and seeing them all. I'll probably be throwing hamburger buns across the deck at a BBQ, but I'll be damn happy to do it.

The Decisions

I detest life decisions. Big, looming bastards that you know have the potential to change your future. Everyone tells you it will work out, that something will happen and the answer will be obvious, but I think they are all full of shit. We can make as many pros and cons lists as we want. We can lay awake as many nights as our bodies will let us. We can try to rationalize or we can bang our heads against the shower wall, but ultimately, we just choose. That's it. We simply, choose. We pick one or the other, sometimes with a reason we seem to have worked out in our heads that makes sense, or else just throwing caution to the wind. So, that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to choose. I'm tired of rationalizing. And Ray here, he helps with that. He knows me so well.